Mini ba loose anyone

Travelling around Blantyre (and most other places in Malawi to be exact) is usually done via the minibus. The above photo shows the main minibus terminus by Blantyre Market. When you first arrive it is quite bewildering trying to work out which minibus to get on, not helped by the fact that my pronunciation of where I live is somewhat different to the way Malawians pronounce it. As you approach the minibuses all you can hear is something something minibaloose eg Limbe minibaloose (Limbe minibus just in case you hadn't worked it out) so all the minibus conductors are shouting out their destinations whilst at the same time the mini bus drivers are beeping their horns. The cacophony of sound is quite deafening. There are however conductors whose sole job it is to make sure that the minibuses get filled up and they get on their way, and they always help you get on to the right minibus once you have correctly pronounced where you are going. The system works and I always get where I want to be or as near as damnit.

So in the early days my minibus conversations would go along the lines of

Conductor : Sister, where do you want to go

Me: Nyambadwe

Conductor: where

Me: Nyambadwe

Conductor: Stares blankly

Helpful other: where are you going sister?

Me: Nyambadwe

Helpful other: translates to bus conductor and I get on minibus

Or alternatively it would go

Conductor: sister, where do you want to go

Me: Nyambadwe

Conductor: Where

Me: Nyambadwe

Conductor: Stares blankly

Me: Nearrandy ( Ndirande - when pronounced it sounds to me like near randy)

Gets on minibus and has to get off further down the road than wanted as didn't really want Ndirande as the turn off is too soon for my road.

Now the conversation goes much more smoothly

Bus Conductor: Sister, where do you want to go

Me: Machinjiri (as I have now found out that this is the minibaloose that stops at the bottom of my road- yeah) – it is only a mile then to my house.

Bus conductor then directs to me to the correct minibus

I get on minibus, and when it is full it goes. As this is the main form of transport there are often people with suitcases, regularly live chickens hanging by their legs from various peoples bags, big plastic bowls, huge bags of charcoal. If it is raining you have no hope of getting on, it is a mass free for all then. There are usually 12 seats but 16-17 passengers. Sometimes the windscreens are intact but more often not, and usually have big cracks in them. To save petrol which is very expensive here, the engine will be turned off whilst going down hill, sitting at traffic lights, waiting to turn out of the road or generally not moving for whatever reason. If you are unlucky the minibus will run out of petrol before you reach the petrol station, and then the conductor has to get out and push. They haven't made us push it yet, and regularly you will need to pull into the nearest petrol station, where upon you all have to get off whilst they get some fuel.

And now when I want to get off, instead of trying to grab the bus conductors attention or get someone else on the bus to translate that I want to get off I just calmly say

Kutsika, and as if by magic the minibus pulls over.

I then try and make a dignified exit whilst trying not to trample over everyone as I am usually at the back, and it is not the done thing to get out of the way, and also to not bump my head on the door as I exit, all at the same time saying pepani (sorry) for stepping on peoples feet, and zikomo (thank you).

Minibaloose anyone!